Well we have a house...hopefully, pending successful inspections. We will close officially in mid May....pending all the inspections.
I want to be more excited but I kinda waiting in doom for the inspection to go wrong ...
Monday, March 30, 2009
Sunday, March 29, 2009
I think...I hope...
We went back out today to search for houses...now let me tell you up front I have certain ...shall we call them *feelings* about some things. Apparently houses are not one of those things I have special *feelings* about when I first look.
I found a house on Craigslist (yes, I am a Craigslist junkie) anyways found it on Craigslist, its in a sought after neighborhood in one of the nicer areas of Springfield and it was in our price range. I sent it to Drew to send to our realator... the pics showed a great house. lots of room and yummyness. We got a time to go look at it and of course I had to tell Drew that this was the one (before I saw it) I said I had a feeling...I am telling you right now I did have a feeling a good one, and then we walked inside. My good feeling turned into a puff of smoke, this house was all ceiling, very little house. And so the cycle of my disappointment continues.
We go the next house ... which by the way has been on the market for almost a year...yes about 365 days aka long time...we went in thinking something has to be wrong with this house we just get to have another "adventure". We walked in and I tell you I got a good vibe, the kitchen made me gooey inside and the laundry room made me smile, but the secret crawl space (for the laundry basket) between the laundry room and master bath made me giggle and then climb through. Basically its a spot in the master bath that has the apperance of a cabnient on the floor...but then u open it and boom you just slide you laundry basket (full of dirty or clean clothes) into the laundry room. This made me giggle purely b/c I would not have to carry a basket of clothes all the way around to the laudry room from the master bedroom....or I could just crawl through it (which by the way is good exercise). The big bedrooms and openness in the family room and did I mention the kitchen...made me extremley excited...
and so we make our first offer on a house....here we go
I found a house on Craigslist (yes, I am a Craigslist junkie) anyways found it on Craigslist, its in a sought after neighborhood in one of the nicer areas of Springfield and it was in our price range. I sent it to Drew to send to our realator... the pics showed a great house. lots of room and yummyness. We got a time to go look at it and of course I had to tell Drew that this was the one (before I saw it) I said I had a feeling...I am telling you right now I did have a feeling a good one, and then we walked inside. My good feeling turned into a puff of smoke, this house was all ceiling, very little house. And so the cycle of my disappointment continues.
We go the next house ... which by the way has been on the market for almost a year...yes about 365 days aka long time...we went in thinking something has to be wrong with this house we just get to have another "adventure". We walked in and I tell you I got a good vibe, the kitchen made me gooey inside and the laundry room made me smile, but the secret crawl space (for the laundry basket) between the laundry room and master bath made me giggle and then climb through. Basically its a spot in the master bath that has the apperance of a cabnient on the floor...but then u open it and boom you just slide you laundry basket (full of dirty or clean clothes) into the laundry room. This made me giggle purely b/c I would not have to carry a basket of clothes all the way around to the laudry room from the master bedroom....or I could just crawl through it (which by the way is good exercise). The big bedrooms and openness in the family room and did I mention the kitchen...made me extremley excited...
and so we make our first offer on a house....here we go
Friday, March 27, 2009
House Hunting
Oh Perfect House ..where oh where can you be...
So Drew and I are house hunting...we have gone through about 10 and found a good one but then found out that wouldn't work out ...we had to keep looking... So we are going back out this weekend.
This business of house hunting and buying is just not for me. I'm used to going to the store, picking out what I like and going home with it...but with house buying you have to make offers, negotiate with the seller and the bank. To many hoops to jump through for me, to much unsureness (thats my own made up word) of what if we don't get it, will we get it and that evil temptation to imagine your stuff here and there, what colors would work for the walls...etc...
I just want to pick it out, buy it and have it...
So Drew and I are house hunting...we have gone through about 10 and found a good one but then found out that wouldn't work out ...we had to keep looking... So we are going back out this weekend.
This business of house hunting and buying is just not for me. I'm used to going to the store, picking out what I like and going home with it...but with house buying you have to make offers, negotiate with the seller and the bank. To many hoops to jump through for me, to much unsureness (thats my own made up word) of what if we don't get it, will we get it and that evil temptation to imagine your stuff here and there, what colors would work for the walls...etc...
I just want to pick it out, buy it and have it...
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Trust
So on Sunday Drew and I had a first...
it was the 1st time we have given 10% of our income as a tithe to God.
It was a big thing, here we are, growing in our relationship with God through doing nightly devotionals with The Purpose Driven Life, which reminds us of the need to trust God with everything...including money. This was hard...harder than either one of us thought.
We are suppoused to be saving money for a house, but we knew (from doing this devotional) that we would never truly get a house or make any head way in life if we didn't give our tithe to God. We are trusting in him with everything...he says he will provide us with what we need, and in May we will need a house. I am so scared yet I have never been so hopeful and excited to see what and where God will take us. But my little human self is still scared.
.... all we can do is trust in his faithfulness.
it was the 1st time we have given 10% of our income as a tithe to God.
It was a big thing, here we are, growing in our relationship with God through doing nightly devotionals with The Purpose Driven Life, which reminds us of the need to trust God with everything...including money. This was hard...harder than either one of us thought.
We are suppoused to be saving money for a house, but we knew (from doing this devotional) that we would never truly get a house or make any head way in life if we didn't give our tithe to God. We are trusting in him with everything...he says he will provide us with what we need, and in May we will need a house. I am so scared yet I have never been so hopeful and excited to see what and where God will take us. But my little human self is still scared.
.... all we can do is trust in his faithfulness.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
I gotta get this off my chest...
It seems everyone around me is either pregnant or has a baby....why is that? Even people who just got married are poppin up pregnant. Thats just what it seems like to me. Don't get me wrong..please...if you have a baby or are pregnant I am beyond happy for you. I am just wondering why it is that everyone I seem to know is either going to have or has kids.
Being married for 5 years I guess is weird and still not have a kid or two but let me explain the reasoning...b/c I'm starting to get the question, "well dont u want kids?" or "are u ever going to get around to it?" or some other question that has to do with being married for 5 years and still no kid.
Drew and I got married 5 years ago and everyone thought we were getting married because we were pregnant, or everyone thought we got engaged in high school cause we were pregnant. And now everyone thinks we are funny or weird to still not have kids after 5 years of being married. Ok so heres some reasoning. When we did get married we barely had a pot to pee in and a window to throw it out in (as my grandma would say) and we were both in school and school to both of us has always been a huge deal and goal. Now think would it be wise for us to have brought a child into this world when we neither one had an education or money and were livin from week to week? It would have been possible but truly not what we wanted for our future children...and now people ask well why not now?
It all goes back to the idea that Drew and I have come to understand...and that is when its time you'll know and if you can barely provide for yourself what makes it wise to bring a whole other person into this world that your mission is to care for. We want more for our kids than what we had....and further more I just dont feel ready yet...and gosh darn it I think thats ok! We are enjoying our time together just the two of us...constantly moving (seems like), traveling whenever we want, just being together just the two of us ...truly learning the wonders of commiting our lives to another person forever.
We will have kids but just not now....
Am I ready?....no not quite yet, I want to teach a while, and furthermore I shouldn't have kids right now medically b/c of the meds I'm on for my pacemaker and heart. Does that mean I cant have kids..nope but this heart stuff has to get figured out before I can think about trying to have kids....b/c obviously I wanna be around to see them! The other thing is since I've been in working at the daycare I know I don't want my kids from 8 weeks on in daycare day in and day out....its just personal opinion, I want to stay home with them and financially, and career wise I'm not ready for that. And I know I wont have family around to take care of them (if I did, that'd be different).
Am I more ready now than even last year? Oh yeah... I can't wait to have a baby, I wonder if the day will come some times, but then I remember that it will in time. I think right now ...I'm more ready for a baby than Drew is (he's still in 2 much love with his job to think about much else...which is good!) But this time next year...yeah I'll prolly be ready but who knows....God does and he knows when I'll be ready b/c becoming a parent is not something to go into lightly. And in the meantime I'm learning all the things to do with kids and not do..
Ok so now I feel better ...prolly until someone else asks me when I'm going to have kids again!
Just wanted to get that sermon and preachin off my chest:)
Being married for 5 years I guess is weird and still not have a kid or two but let me explain the reasoning...b/c I'm starting to get the question, "well dont u want kids?" or "are u ever going to get around to it?" or some other question that has to do with being married for 5 years and still no kid.
Drew and I got married 5 years ago and everyone thought we were getting married because we were pregnant, or everyone thought we got engaged in high school cause we were pregnant. And now everyone thinks we are funny or weird to still not have kids after 5 years of being married. Ok so heres some reasoning. When we did get married we barely had a pot to pee in and a window to throw it out in (as my grandma would say) and we were both in school and school to both of us has always been a huge deal and goal. Now think would it be wise for us to have brought a child into this world when we neither one had an education or money and were livin from week to week? It would have been possible but truly not what we wanted for our future children...and now people ask well why not now?
It all goes back to the idea that Drew and I have come to understand...and that is when its time you'll know and if you can barely provide for yourself what makes it wise to bring a whole other person into this world that your mission is to care for. We want more for our kids than what we had....and further more I just dont feel ready yet...and gosh darn it I think thats ok! We are enjoying our time together just the two of us...constantly moving (seems like), traveling whenever we want, just being together just the two of us ...truly learning the wonders of commiting our lives to another person forever.
We will have kids but just not now....
Am I ready?....no not quite yet, I want to teach a while, and furthermore I shouldn't have kids right now medically b/c of the meds I'm on for my pacemaker and heart. Does that mean I cant have kids..nope but this heart stuff has to get figured out before I can think about trying to have kids....b/c obviously I wanna be around to see them! The other thing is since I've been in working at the daycare I know I don't want my kids from 8 weeks on in daycare day in and day out....its just personal opinion, I want to stay home with them and financially, and career wise I'm not ready for that. And I know I wont have family around to take care of them (if I did, that'd be different).
Am I more ready now than even last year? Oh yeah... I can't wait to have a baby, I wonder if the day will come some times, but then I remember that it will in time. I think right now ...I'm more ready for a baby than Drew is (he's still in 2 much love with his job to think about much else...which is good!) But this time next year...yeah I'll prolly be ready but who knows....God does and he knows when I'll be ready b/c becoming a parent is not something to go into lightly. And in the meantime I'm learning all the things to do with kids and not do..
Ok so now I feel better ...prolly until someone else asks me when I'm going to have kids again!
Just wanted to get that sermon and preachin off my chest:)
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
This time last year..
As I sit here...doing my basic nothing I find myself thinking back to this time last year. This time last year I was nose deep in teaching 24 5th graders. Gosh I loved them...at the time I was never so busy as I was then, I was always at school. I got up at 6:15 every morning and was at school by 7:30 and usually stayed until at least 5 or 6. I was never so tired but never so happy with my work. My mind never stopped, I was always thinking of ways to improve my teaching, how to make the next days lesson more fun, how to get through grading 24 papers from 6 subjects.
And now I'm nose deep in 15 1 and a half and 2 and a half snot nosed, poopy diapered, sweet talkin, adorable smiles. I really love them but last year was beyond anything so wonderful, I am hoping and praying for a job with elementary kids. Ones who for the most part keep their snot and throw up to themselves.
I wouldn't trade last year and my 5th graders for anything. I miss them so much. I am learning the patience of Job in order to find my dream job of teaching 5th graders...(or even 3rd, or 6th, or 4th).
Last year I did not know how good I had it, I cherish every moment, stressful or wonderful. Teaching my 5th graders, they made me sure of what my dream was and is...to teach upper elementary...I place my faith in God, in someone who knows more than I...much more.
And now I'm nose deep in 15 1 and a half and 2 and a half snot nosed, poopy diapered, sweet talkin, adorable smiles. I really love them but last year was beyond anything so wonderful, I am hoping and praying for a job with elementary kids. Ones who for the most part keep their snot and throw up to themselves.
I wouldn't trade last year and my 5th graders for anything. I miss them so much. I am learning the patience of Job in order to find my dream job of teaching 5th graders...(or even 3rd, or 6th, or 4th).
Last year I did not know how good I had it, I cherish every moment, stressful or wonderful. Teaching my 5th graders, they made me sure of what my dream was and is...to teach upper elementary...I place my faith in God, in someone who knows more than I...much more.
Friday, January 9, 2009
For a moment ...
My scar...2 months out of surgery For a moment today I forgot I had a pacemaker... and then I felt my heart beat kinda funny and I remembered.
It doesn't hurt at all but I can feel the beats are funny when the pacemaker pops in to motion for my heart. I can't really describe it other than...if you have ever felt your heart miss a beat, thats kinda what it feels like, only mine doesn't miss it, it has something else to beat for it.
Right now I'm sorta in the stage where everytime I feel it I'm reminded that if not for it, I wouldn't be here. It's weird...very weird to think that if not for this thing I wouldn't be here right at that moment when my heart beats funny.
My heart stopped in the hospital for 23 seconds, I awoke to nurses with paddles over me, if I hadn't of gotten the pacemaker when I did the next time my heart may have decided to stop for longer...which deprives my brain of oxygen... and maybe the next time it wouldn't have restarted itself...yeah I know scary.
There is a reason I am here.... I know that now, if there wasn't I wouldn't be.
Don't think I saw the white light when my heart stopped (thats what Drew asked me a couple weeks ago...if I saw a great white light like the movies say you do when your heart stops)
So why am I here? I dont have a clue, but God knows, because he moved me to the best cardiac doctors in the midwest(to Springfield IL) just last June so I know there a reason for everything...
"My flesh and heart may fail but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever" Psalm 73:26
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